Want a tip?

Don’t tell your grandparents when you decide to go tanning.

It wasn’t like I called them up and said “HEY NANA AND PAPA I WENT TANNING IN A CANCER CAUSING MACHINE.” But I might as well have. I answered the phone this afternoon, they asked what I did this afternoon…

Well.

I started saying I went to work,  then I continued into how I went to school until 3 and slipped in there that I went to lunch with my friend (Chineseeee), had pedicures and tanned.

Tan.

That was the magical word that spun into a 5 minute speech about cancer and ruining my life.

Isn’t that up to me?

I said it completely casually. I didn’t mean to draw attention to the fact I was tanning. My cousin tans. Who cares?

I’m complaining. I think this is stupid. I don’t do anything bad or illegal. Can’t I tan? Good Lord. I’m not orange, I just bought a 3 month package. I started today. I’m not even pink!

They couldn’t have told me about the UV rays drying my nails or the acetone fumes that are going to make me high in the remover?

Oh, they could have. But no.

Btw, if they freaking cared my nails are pink.

AND I HAD A FABULOUS DAY.

AND MY OUTFIT WAS CUTE.

AND I KNOW NOBODY CARES BECAUSE I’M JUST GONNA DIE OF CANCER NOW -apparently- BUT THERE’S MORE TO MY LIFE THAN BAKING IN A MACHINE.

 

AND MY NAILS SMUDGED.

Fml: Allison